In March 2019, I spent a week in the hospital with a kidney infection that led to a whole bunch of other fun infections. I've been through my share of shit in life, but there isn't much scarier than the mix of emotions I felt laying in that hospital bed for what felt like an eternity - the isolation, the frustration, the "I'm just fucking laying here when I should be out in the world being a part of something". It got me thinking a lot about my father, who was a musician his whole life. Despite his last few years being weighed down by illness and other factors, he still tried to make as much music as he was able to. But I can do even better than that: my own records, working on other people's records, resonating with folks in bars and basements all over, maybe even seeing the country or the rest of the world! If/when the time comes for my own body to start falling apart, leaving me barely able to function most days, I at least want to be able to say that I did enough cool things with my life that it doesn't feel like it was wasted.
That, combined with the fact that Hallucinogenic Bulb had already at that point far exceeded my not very high expectations, served as a sign that I can and should step it up a bit. I also felt like I'd done about all I could exclusively with loops and samples in Unity, so it was time to add some elements that'll let me play around a bit more freely anyway. So I did what anyone 2-3 years into the noise game would do: Buy a bunch of pedals for the first time! This ended up being exactly what I wanted and needed to explore new territory. Looking back at it now in 2021, I can’t believe I made it that far with just the Unity loopers.
Frail Vessel is the result of that perfect storm of needing to step it up both personally and technically. I wasn’t always so sure about it, but now I know not only that I CAN create things that resonate with people one way or another, but that I NEED to, even if it’s only for me. Or else, I might literally explode.
I know it's corny and played out to say this at this point, but after being back and forth in my own head about this album for months, I genuinely feel like Frail Vessel is the Hallucinogenic Bulb LP I've always wanted (and have tried a few times already) to make. I hope you get something out of it the same way I got a lot out of making it. ♥
credits
released November 19, 2021
You can thank Dave Petersen for most of this mess.
Theremin on Null by Sean Barrett.